But what if I can't let go?
People always said till it's easy to let go of things that makes you sad.
In fact, it's hard. You tried to ignore it but it just keeps coming back to haunt you.
Sometimes I feel so sick and tired of this life I'm living in.
I've tried to change, but when things dont go my way, I just feel like giving up.
And sometimes I seriously dontknow how this guy above endure my temper and all.
Choosing not to flare up at me, is it really love or giving in?
Choosing to let me complain and bad mood, is it really love or enduring?
I dontknow. I'm not doubting our relationship now.
I'm just amaze by how he can really endure me. Really not being angry at me for once.
Cause I can't be that nice, I can't hide my anger, my sadness, my disappointments to make others happy. Maybe for people that I'm not close with I can, but with someone so close, I'll just flare up.
Cry like a bitch, laugh like an idiot and angry like a slut! You understand?!
And whenever I flare up at him, I'll feeling so fucking guilty then I start to blame myself.
I'll start asking myself why am I doing this? It's not his fault and all.
And when I start to blame myself, my mood get worst and I ignore him more.
I'm such a ironic girl. Gawdddddddddddddddddddddddd,
I do hate myself. People always think I expect too much from myself, but who don't.
Everyone does.
Just want to say, I'm sorry.
I always only know how to say sorry, but I'm seriously sorry.
I can't guarantee that all those things wont happen again, but I know I'll still be able to tell you I'm sincerely sorry, like seriously sincerely.
Sometimes I wonder when you will get tired of me and I get so scared.
Libra dont like to lose people in their life. They tries to make everyone they love to stay unless they tried their hardest but it's still useless.
I tried hard to make people stay before, but in the end, they are all gone.
Maybe I'm not a good friend, maybe I'm not a good girlf, but I always try my hardest.
I only give up when I know it's useless, nothing is going to help anymore.
Maybe years later our feelings will fade, but for now, we should just cherish.
Or I should say, I should cherish you more.
Sincerely,
