I'm afraid of changing because I'm scared of what others say about me.
See the ring up there, hehehe.
Dear bought it for me, but I nag at him like for ages!
Haha, I've been like aiming for this ring for quite long but you know, 我很穷.
Everytime earn dao money then got a bit 舍不得 buy.
Cause it's like, a want not a need.
And I dont like Dear spending money on things that aren't important.
I know he wants me to be happy uh. I am. Haha.
Just, aiyaaaa, I dont know how to say. But seriously thank you (:
Morning went to Jurong West Swimming Complex for swimming.
So nice, 10 laps! New record yo. Hehe.
And there was this guy that taught me how to swim in a easier and smooth way.
Quite cool lah actually, but a bit scary. Haha.
Like a stranger suddenly come talk to me, and he said he was observing me, like a direct only can.
Swam till 11am and off I went.
Went to Jurong Point to get bubble tea and cai fan and home I go !
Ate famous amos cookies too. Nice dao actually ate three only, in the end keep taking and taking. And now I feel like killing myself cause I eat too much I think ):
Gahhhh.
While lying on the bed just now, was like reading articles on Aneroxic girls cause I got a feeling I will become like those girls one day.
It's seriously scary, their arms is skinny daoooo and they still think they are fat.
They fat then I what sia, can go jump down already right!
But I somehow understand how they feel. Just like it's never good enough. Like for me, I always feel that I dont have a flat tummy and I'm really upset over it.
Other people dont understand you, they dont see the difference but there is a difference for you. Haha, ok, I'm crapping.
Just want to say, people surrounding aneroxic people shouldnt keep forcing them to eat, you must talk to them, understand how they are feeling and change it.
Like now, I just gonna heckcare everything about weight.
Cause I got to be healthy. Exercise do the slimming job too :D
Though I still feel like slimming down, I still miss the feeling of having a flat stomach, I still miss the feeling of starving myself and when I wake up to weigh myself, I feel perfectly beautiful.
But all those have to go, because I realize that, I can't be what I am not, no matter how hard I try. We all got to face the truth, but I decided to look through everything earlier so I'll have a better life next time.
No point grabbing onto something that arent yours.
Work time in a few more hours. I'm bored of life and I'm kinda scared to go to work because of the people there. It's like, weird.
I dont know what they are thinking about. Pathetic me.
Alright, got to stop blabbering.
I dont't want to get back to the past.
